Cross out everything you’ve ever done:
Girl cause I’ve been thinkin bout you na naahhh na nah. Do you think about me too?
Actual Quotes from my Dad (An English Teacher)
Dad: Why the hell did you put a comma there?
Dad: Do you even know what a participial phrase is?
Dad: Omg. He’s like my favorite character of all time.
Dad: Who should I dress up as for the movie premier?
Dad: Hey are you awak? I know it’s late, but you read Animal Farm, right? Yeah. I need you to read this report. I can’t tell if I am just super tired or if this is actual bullshit.
Dad: Alesha wouldn’t be able to spell ‘definitely’ right if wrote it down for her. She would fucking erase it and then write ‘defiantly’, because she doesn’t care. I hate her.
Dad: I need you to bake brownies. I lost a bet.
Dad: Omg. You cannot ship me with Gilcher. You know I don’t like tattoos and he’s like twenty-five. And for Christ’s sake, he teaches math.
Dad: Omg. Gilcher said the funniest thing today.
Dad: Mrs. Ashworth and I have decided to start a band. It’ll be called Great Expectations.
Dad: It’s like you didn’t read the fucking book.
Dad: Okay. So this week you’re reading this book I stole from Mrs. Ashworth’s. It’s like sixty pages long, but you’ll love it.
Dad: *puts books on my bed for me to read everyday and demands that I read them*
Dad: My son doesn’t like reading. I have not only failed him, but society. You aren’t my son. Leave.
Dad: Okay. So you’re getting books for Christmas. All of you. I get discounts on them since I’m a teacher, and since I’m a teacher, it’s all I can afford, so…
Dad: Fucking standardized testing can go fuck itself in the ass.
Dad: I have to teach for the required testing instead of what they really need to know.
Dad: Fuck the government.
Dad: Fuck the school board.
Dad: Close the door.
Dad: Charles Dickens was so fucking pretentious, and I hate him, but he also caused change, but he’s such a Dick. Ha. DICKens.
Dad: I love puns.
Dad: People who say sarcasm is the lowest form of humor are assholes.
Dad: Please shut up.
Dad: Catching Fire was the worst book but the best movie and that feels weird.
Dad: I wouldn’t get so mad when you call me at school if you didn’t change your ringtones to inappropriate rap music.
Dad: I fucking hate Alesha. She asked what countries were apart of Austria-Hungary today and I almost told her to get out.
Dad: You cannot visit my school in a dress that short. There are boys there.
Dad: Barbra Parks is fucking Queen.
Dad: I need you to make me a good, relaxing playlist for silent reading. I’m too lazy.
Dad: If I have to watch two of my students grind on each other at one more dance, I will kill them both.
Dad: They act like I care what they think.
Dad: I hate homework.
Dad: I have decided to become a politician.
Dad: What’s the one book with the guys and the one kills the other and the chick without a name who dies and the short angry man? Mouseman? Oh my fucking gosh. Of Mice and Men. I have failed.
A peek inside the exploits and privileged private lives of L.A.’s most with-it, starring three random people. This is basically the Kardashians. Cast and Cre…
this video that i filmed is actually doing pretty well and i am SO EXCITED. watch!
tattoo Studio Ghibli
who even colours like that! wow.
An accurate depiction of the impact of technology in social circles.
don’t let tumblr make you believe that
-smoking is cool
-being a narcissistic bitch is acceptable
-trusting nobody is healthy
-starving yourself will make you beautiful
-hating everybody is okay
- that working hard for grades isn’t worth the time
- that having mental health condition is a perk
- that self harm should be romanticized
- that abusive and codependent relationships are cute
- that not being in a minority makes you any less of a person
Had a beer Smoked an entire cigarette Done drugs. (weed and xanax count?) Written on a bathroom wall. Read a George Orwell book. Had a physical fight. Used Twitter. Listened to Lady Gaga Been in a car accident.
- Gotten suspended.
- Gotten expelled.
Been allergic to something.
- Got a computer virus.
Touched a real gun. Had a dog.
- Had a cat
- Been pregnant.
- Camped out
Swam in the ocean. Wore a bikini Driven a car Been sent to the principal. Ever liked someone.
- Failed a class.
Failed a test. Went to summer school. Got worse than a D Got A’s and B’s. Read an entire book.
- Recorded my own music.
Had an xbox.
- Worn heels more than 3 days in a row.
- Wore fishnets.
Wore skinny jeans. Hated someone.
- Been cheated on.
- Cheated on someone.
Practised Christianity. Worn makeup. Lied to my parents about where I was going. Had surgery. Had my license.
- Attempted suicide.
- Worn coloured contacts.
Painted my nails black.
- Broken someone’s heart.
- Had my heart broken.
Cried for an hour straight Lost something very valuable. Got separated from one of my parents as a kid. Broken a bone. Gotten stung by a bee. Eaten something bad/expired.
- Threw up from being so drunk.
Saw someone throw up from being so drunk. Danced with someone of the same sex. Owned an ipod Owned an iphone. Fell for a best friend. Stole a friend’s significant other. Went far away from home for more than a week.
- Moved out.
- Ran away.
Had a job.
- Been fired.
Lied to a friend. Lied to a family member. Had a Facebook. Posted a video on Youtube.
- Started a rumor about someone.
Talked bad about someone
- Deliberately failed a test.
Been skinny dipping.
- Counted to a million.
- Counted to a thousand.
- Ate rabbit meat.
- Ate duck meat.
Had fast food. Been to Church.
- Been to Canada.
- Been married.
- Had a divorce.
Broke a glass Hugged someone today. Texted someone today. Received a phone call today. Threw something out of the window. Ignored a text from someone on purpose. Wished you were somebody else. Had my feelings hurt by a friend and never told them. Been to a concert Seen your favourite band live Met a celebrity
- Met your favourite band
Own more than 10 CD’s
We love Mindy!
A belated one for grandma. Hills of Ireland? #drawyoucards
“When they’re babies, people will come up and say to you ‘Are they a boy or a girl?’ when the kid’s in the pram and you can’t tell. And immediately when you tell them which gender it is they will behave differently according to what you tell them. It got to the point where we didn’t want people to know what gender the baby was. Just treat it as you’d treat someone you wanted to be nice to! Why is it so important to you to know? And then you hear people saying ‘Oh, look at him, he’s a little flirt isn’t he’, or ‘Oooh, she’s gonna wrap you around her little finger’ and all this. What are you on about? She’s two months old, she’s just shat herself.”Alan Davies completely and utterly demolishing gender roles (via vanillanice)
i’m unhappy and a downer and just clearly not close with anyone.
seriously considering switching majors.
i haven’t taken my prescription for amphetamine salts (generic adderall) in over a week and it is really fucking hard. I am more me, sure, but i can’t focus on a god damn thing.
and i love being more me… i can think creatively and i’m not robotic but i’ve literally been taking adderall or some form of it since i was 14. i’m 20 now. that’s a long fucking time and it is difficult to go from taking it every single day for the last six years (minus a few days in the summer) to not taking it at all. and now i know why people drink coffee. seriously.
ugh. i’m writing this now partly because i have a giant paper (rough draft of a 10 pger) due tomorrow and i’m stressed and distracted.
“Life’s too short to drink crappy coffee and cry over boys who don’t care.”Matty Healy (the 1975)